Letting Go

My sleep patterns for the last 72 hours have been 14 hours a night and no more than 6 hours of wakefulness before I crash again. I'm posting this just before I cook lunch and take my medication, so if it kicks off and knocks me out again, you'll have this news to think about.

My lungs were playing chords again in the night, and the sounds reminded me of the the synthesiser noises in the background of this song.



On Thursday afternoon, I stayed alert and had a great discussion with my Local Wise Woman about all the blocked-up, accumulated, unresolved emotions - all the things I need to get off my chest, you see?

Most of these are very, very old, and a lot of them are about birth trauma. That makes sense of all the distress I experience when I'm coughing, and the conviction I have that something is trying to force me out against my will. Because, once upon a time, that's exactly what did happen.

I posted way back about a demon that left my soul. Well, I underestimated the multitude of horrors I've been carrying around. This is illness is turning into a major letting go for me.

When the room is quiet
The daylight almost gone
It seems there's something
I should know
Well I ought to leave
But the rain it never stops
And I've no particular place to go

Just when I think I'm winning
When I've broken every door
The ghosts of my life
Blow wilder than before
Just when I thought
I could not be stopped
When my chance came to be king
The ghosts of my life
Blew wilder than the wind

Well I'm feeling nervous
Now I find myself alone
The simple life's no longer there
Once I was so sure
Now the doubt inside my mind
Comes and goes but leads nowhere

Just when I think I'm winning
When I've broken every door
The ghosts of my life
Blow wilder than before

Just when I thought
I could not be stopped
When my chance came to be king
The ghosts of my life
Blew wilder than the wind
JAPAN

Pet Boys

If you're one of those smart, modern, professional women who juggle their lives, and you can't make up your mind whether you want a dog, a boyfriend, a baby, or just a shiny new sex toy, there's good news from Asia, where the Koreans have invented a new kind of relationship that combines elements of all four.


Pet Boys are young men who offer themselves for adoption by lonely women, who get to keep them and do pretty much what they want with them. The idea started out as an 'anime' cartoon about a woman who is always unlucky in love, who picks up a homeless boy off the street one day and takes him home. Evidently plenty of Korean women liked the sound of that.

And if you're a nineteen year-old masochistic Asian boy, I suppose being kept in a closet full of high heeled shoes, and taken out occasionally and used for sex, must be ... well actually, I'll let you make your own minds up about that. Watch the video.

Breastfed Babies Become Better Bloggers

I have absolutely no evidence to support this assertion.

I just like the alliteration.

Get Britain Breast Feeding

It's International Midwives' Day today, which gives me a good reason to blog about three things dear to my heart - women, babies, and breasts.

The charity Best Beginnings wanted to do something about the image breastfeeding has in the UK. For some reason, despite the fact that images of women's breasts are everywhere , the knowledge that you can also pop one into a baby's mouth and give it a healthy meal is somehow seen as a bit meh.

Less than 2 per cent of British babies are exclusively breastfed at six months, which is what the World Health Organisation recommends for all babies. Young mothers (20 and under) are particularly reluctant to feed. The winning poster campaign by two students at Central St. Martins celebrates 'cool, multitasking breasts' and emphasises that breastfeeding enhances intimacy and emotional bonding between a woman and her baby, and a woman and her partner.

By Sophie Barker and Kayleigh Brooks for Get Britain Breast Feeding
(Best Beginnings Central Saint Martins Poster Competition)

http://getbritainbreastfeeding.org.uk/
Read the blog post at Boinkology
Read the article in the Independent