Twenty Ten

I took a long holiday over Christmas and New Year, and went to stay with friends. It was the right thing to do, because I was physically and emotionally tired, and as soon as I got on the train to London I began to feel myself unfolding.

2009 was a moderately good year for me, but I feel very glad the first decade of the century is over. (Apologies to anyone who counts from one and not zero.) It was a hard decade for me, including the death of a child, the end of a marriage and, very nearly, the loss of my whole self.

We live and learn. And we love one another, the best we can.

Happy New Current Year, everybody.

Writ by his own hand this day,
St. Dwynwen's Day,
in the Year of Our Lord Ten Past Eight

Endings and Beginnings

A man in a yellow fluorescent waistcoat came knocking at my front door. He wanted me to move my car. It was Tuesday, the hottest day of the year, and they had come to lay fresh tarmac on the road that goes from the lower well up towards Waterford.

Yesterday it was even hotter. I drove my car along that fresh tarmac, with the windows down and a light fresh tarmac smell rising from the carriageway. The hedgerows were full of elderflower and wild garlic, and I was pleased the roadmenders had managed to do their work without tearing up any greenery. My village still feels timeless and medieval, even when the road swishes smoothly under my tyres, instead of thunk a thunk thunking like I was on a horse and cart.

It's almost two months since my birthday, and I've hardly posted on my blog at all. I want you all to know that that I've been all right. I haven't been hiding, I haven't been depressed; I've just had way too much work to do. This is a good thing, except when it makes me tired. I am learning to go to bed early.

I am happy - I think - and I will try to get back into the blogging habit in July. I deserve some work life balance. Since May, everything has been endings and beginnings, and I'm doing many, many things for the first time. Got to earn a living. Would rather earn a living that had some integrity. And live long. My learning curve is long, but I trust that it bends toward happiness.

To the friends out there I've been neglecting: I love you and care for you as much as ever I did. Thank you for being someone who brings out the best in me. Your friendship makes me happy.

It's raining today. I like it.