Saturday, 29 March 2008

When A Man Hasn't Been Kissed

When I haven't been kissed in a long time,
I walk behind well-dressed women
on cold, December mornings and shovel
the steamy exhalations pluming from their lips
down my throat with both hands, hoping
a single molecule will cling to my lungs.

When I haven't been kissed in a long time,
I sneak into the ladies room of a fancy restaurant,
dig into the trashcan for a napkin
where a woman checked her lipstick,
then go home, light candles, put on Barry White,
and press the napkin all over my body.

When I haven't been kissed in a long time,
I start thinking leeches are the most romantic
creatures, cause all they want to do is kiss.
If only someone invented a kinder, gentler leech,
I'd paint it bright pink and pretend
Winona Ryder's lips crawled off her face,
up my thigh, and were sucking on my swollen

bicep. When I haven't been kissed
in a long time, I create civil disturbances,
then insult the cops who show up,
till one of them grabs me by the collar
and hurls me up against the squad car,
so I can remember, at least for a moment,
what it's like to be touched.

Jeffrey McDaniel


Anonymous said...

OK, so maybe now I'm beginning to feel not so bad about flaking out on you on saturday....

(near miss, if you ask me :P)

Dash said...


Gordie said...

Tch, horse - I shared something poignant and beautiful, and you had to cheapen it.

The smashing babies' heads post was my special treat for you, not this one.

I, still, ♥ the views said...

kissing is very much overrated, if you ask me

and as for kissing someone who is an excellent kisser. . . best avoided

I, still, ♥ the views said...

(altho, obviously, by then, if you've found that out, it's too late to back track)

Gordie said...

I was really moved by the image of walking behind well-dressed women and trying to breathe the same air as them. That said something.

After that, he gets a bit mad and desperate, but still witty. I liked the reference to Winona Ryder (whatever happened to her?)

Anonymous said...

Didn't she steal loadsa things and get put away for it? Are you into bad woe-men gordie?

I, still, ♥ the views said...

presumably she went off and had babies. . .

did you read about the other brunette (daughter of the guy who was in Love Story - can't recall her name, married some butch man and then left him; or did she marry a tennis player? I'm too confused)(think she was in Ghost, the one that posed naked whilst pregnant) and leeches?

I, still, ♥ the views said...

(I'm surprised that the label on this one isn't celibate)(but perhaps you're not!!)(x)

Gordie said...

No, horse is right. She was caught shoplifting, and disgraced. And now I have made a fool of myself over a bad woman...

Gordie said...

I,LTV It's more "celebrate" than "celibate" for me. I am a happy soul, in my own way